NOTE 2.
Leadership in a time of change: clear calm and connected.
Change is inevitable and for the Christian leader a role as change manager is equally inevitable. Yet change in churches - often very conservative communities - can be very painful, for leader and led alike.Change is always experienced as loss, and with loss come the strong emotions of grief. Anger, fear and sadness are staple diets for people grieving, along with feelings of helplessness, confusion and despair.
For the well intentioned but unsuspecting pastoral leader these strong emotional reactions can be shocking and distressing. For some leaders the more vitriolic responses can be very hurtful. As a result, some leaders question the congregation's godliness, and can even become adversaries to the congregation: accusing, scolding or sulking. Along with this comes grief for the leader themself.
The leader suffers an 'intrapsychic loss': a loss of their previous understandings of their congregation's identity as well as their own identity and competence as a leader. This can be disillusioning and involves the same strong emotions: anger, fear, sadness, helplessness, confusion and despair.
The blood loss (and later, scar tissue) from a Christian leader's wounds can lead to very unhelpful impulses. The leader feels overwhelmed by their own emotional reactions and so they soften or harden their plans for change, thus 'blurring' the true picture of what is being undertaken. They can also distance themselves from the more unpleasant opponents of change.
Of course, this just leads to even more strident reactions from the congregation who experience this distancing as a failure to listen, a failure to understand and a failure to care. Their own negative emotional reactions intensify, as does their opposition to the change.
This leads us to the three Cs of facilitating change. In leading change in a congregational setting it is necessary to stay Calm, Clear and Connected.
Calm means that you ignore your own emotional responses, and stay focused and emotionally present with the congregation and even its most deeply grieving members.
Staying clear means that you continue to articulate the change being undertaken in a simple and helpful way. You neither soften nor harden the message in reaction to opposition.
Finally, staying connected means that you remain present with people, hearing their hearts, understanding their loss. By listening calmly you actually affirm your love and concern for them and the future of the church.
Often the most emotionally intense reactions are simply a strategy for communicating sadness and if you can stand there with them and acknowledge their experience that will largely resolve their emotional reactions. They may feel bewildered by the direction you are articulating for the church, but at least they know that you have heard them and have shown that you care!
This analysis of change management undergirds my contributions to the Oilstone leadership equipping program. It also leads to my short hand description of my mentoring ministry for pastoral leaders. Usually I describe my mentoring as 'encouraging pastors to stay calm and to think about what they are doing'! Yielding to intense emotion, and reactive impulses, does not achieve what God requires (and see James 1:20).
Peter Moore, 31 January 2015